Letter's to different kinds of people in my life!

[Jason Mills]

 

A letter to my friend from School;
 

Friday,12th August 2011
 

 

Dear Emily,

 

I thought it was a good idea in trying to write you a letter. I’ve never written you a letter before, so I hope this will be a good experience for both of us.I prayed and hoped that your family member gets well and recovers from Cancer, it must be a difficult time for you and all your relatives, but whatever happens, in the end good will come. I know you might think less of all these positive thoughts of mine, and I wouldn’t blame you in times like these, it’s just I believe brightening up someone’s day brings the world of good to others.

 

I don’t know what to think about School, the thought of returning is both leaving me feeling prepared and nervous. We might be put in separate levels and classes in doing the leaving cert programme, but let’s keep in touch anyways.

 

Imagine, we’ve been friends for over three years now, but we knew each other ever since we we’re little kids, who would have thought that we’d connect to easily and greatly.Emily, I’m so grateful in having you as my best friend, it leaves me feeling cheerful and overjoyed to know that I can trust and confide in you at anytime. I know life isn’t perfect for us lately with all the society loss and problems with the recession, but I’m still happy until the end of my days to know that I have a family and friends like you to count on, if ever needed. It’s nice to know that you can communicate and have someone to talk to, especially with friends like ourselves. I can be that friend you can depend on if issues or sorrow rises within you, I will always forgive you in anything you do wrong, but you need to promise me that you’ll forgive yourself for anything that happens when I’m gone for a while. It’s a very obvious  prospect that when our education  finishes that we’ll follow different roads and ideals of our own. But if this happens between us, I’d be even more happier in continuing to write and keep in contact with you.We all have specific instincts that tell us when we do right or wrong, let’s just hope that we’ll follow the right ones, for our own safety and happiness to come.

 

I believe in a destiny Emily, I believe in happiness and love and even other longing things from that category. I often wondered what our lives will be like after school, it’s a very exciting subject to be thinking of, to me anyways. Even if we follow the wrong paths or find problems we can’t fix or prepare, still I think it’s good to remember the perfect, golden memories we’ve had as best friends. My inner guidance will guide and protect you, always.

 

Life will pass us by, but memories shall never die!

Have you ever thought about your motives or dreams for the future?I know you once told me that you wanted to become a Model. Well, I think your fit and healthy enough to do anything in physical exercise or fashion. Just remember to believe in yourself and don’t get too into ‘Diet obsession’, be the way you are and be proud of yourself and respect your body’s true beauty in the way it already is.

 

I’ve told you a thousand of times that I’ve always dreamed of becoming a well known writer, but I guess I already am a writer in some sort of way, even if I’m not well known. I’d love to publish stories and some of the things that I’ve already shared from my own life story or diaries in letters to Jay.

 

Do you ever think that I could become a successful person in life and for the world?Do you ever think of how much I love and care for you and all my friends. Even when we argue or have complicated moments in school at lunch break,But still, I never give up on you or the others because in some sense, we all need each other.

We  all need to stick together as the best of friends.It’s very easy for us all to fight, but its harder to keep promises close.So, lets stick together and sort out whatever problems we face, because if we talk to each other, it will help a thousand times more than you least expected.Let’s remember that we’re creating young memories, So let’s make good, unforgettable ones.We haven’t got time to despair, but we do have time to change and be grateful in what we’ve got!

 

Overall, what I’m saying is let’s think about the optimistic sides of things, before the pessimist ones, this way in being an optimist is much more brighter to make you laugh and smile with joy. All of us people in all the world will find a way somehow through the good choices, it’s only a matter of right and truth in patience to get there.

 

Whenever you fall, don’t give up! Get right back up on your feet and see where you stand.Show those who dislike or disrespect you that you’re more than what they say or judge!Prove them wrong by choosing the right path without giving them the benefit of the doubt or satisfaction. Don’t ever let their negativity dwell within you too, don’t dare go down to their jealousy and cowardly level from being bullies, stay where you are as being a good, truthful person to yourself. Never let bad people track you down, I know I’m not good with all this sort of social advise, but I am your friend and I know that you truly deserve happiness and a good life. You’ll find a way to defeat this attack, even by making a doubtful mistake or having doubts or lack of confidence in yourself, be truthful to your own self.

 

My way of defeating ignorance and the bad in people is by ignoring them and not listening. Yes, they may laugh or make me out to be a joke, but at least  I have inner respect and inner dignity to ignore immature urges from people.Sometimes, I might fail by getting seriously hurt or upset, but I guess I’ll still have inner guidance at heart to keep me finding my way again. Truthfully, it is very dramatic how teenagers socialization works in their social grounds, but I haven’t got the time to follow that same ongoing road. I’m not worried about seeking popularity or giving a ‘cool’ impression. I’m more into being my casual-self and having to feel comfortable in the way I choose to be, by being the honest and cheerful Jason Mills.

 

Sadly, these days I’ve heard a lot of news about causes of cancer. I’ve heard about how much cancer can affect people in different ways. It’s terrible, seeing people getting ill or sic or having to be dying from cancer over different reasons. There is no explanation to  the cause in why it happens or even in having a cure yet, but maybe it’s a sign to an individual’s time to pass through death and into an eternal life, or maybe it’s just a warning for anybody or someone to keep watch on their health.

 

All us people who are luckily healthy can hope and pray for a better outcome in the end, but deep down it’s all depending on the person’s mentality, whether they are stressful or coping with their condition. Believe this or not, but depression and too much of stress causes illness’s and bad conditions of health and loss of brain cells too.

 

But like I said, things will turn out for the best, even if it doesn’t seem to be, but actually it really is. It makes me think of all those people who suffered and are suffering with  cancer, there is no way I could understand their pain, but I still do care tremendously. Life will move forward, hopefully sometime in future times, we could come to really understand. To understand how other’s feel when we’re not there, when we too move on to a different stage of life. As generations go on, today’s culture of the present will improve to a new atmosphere of this world. People will help others, people will find true good in their heart to seek their life’s purpose by living happily within our new days that come. Everyone in the human race will come to realize that we’re all equal and accepted as another. I want to live and help mankind by being the bestest I can only be.

 

Also, I’m very sorry to hear about the break up between you and your boyfriend. Maybe you both could talk and sort something out or because good friends and respect each other for the memories ye both shared, once together.You’ll find relationships like this all the time in life Emily. People; such as family and loved ones will be here once to make you satisfied and then their gone to make you miss them more. In another few years, your ex and you will realize that it was all worth it through the end, somehow. You’ll probably look back and laugh at all this, which is why memories and love when it lasts is such a wonderful thing to have.Human emotions are like the waves in a sea, they flow by so quickly. Our feelings at heart and soul are like a deep blue ocean, which I find rather lovely to imagine.

 

Anyways, I think I’ve wrote enough to you for now. I hope you remember this forever and through the days when your alone or feeling down. I will forever be your guardian, even if the flooding waves drag us down with them. Our souls and spirits connected once before and now their friendly and shining as can be, again. Remember me because I’ll never forget you, I am your guardian Angel through a friend on Earth.

Hugs and smiles from your bestest friend,

Jason Mills!

 

 

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Monday, Midnight,

15th august 2011

To my dearest Joe,

 

I’ve been thinking for so long in how I can express myself fully to you. Thinking in how to share my feelings and thoughts to and with you, without seeming too sentimental or extravagantly romantic. This is why I’ve been thinking for so long.It’s too late for me to give up now, I must share my true words with you now. My heart can’t hold back any longer, my heart and soul needs to be poured out to you, in words on this sheet of paper.

I’m so thoughtful right now that it takes time for my soul to adjust  and to be expressed into place. It takes time until I can express my feelings into the explained words that I truly feel. What I feel is difficult to understand, it’s ever so pure and calm. My feelings with all people is different, it’s a unique feeling of empathy and understanding, but it all really depends on my connection with that person. That feeling I share with a person is a logical mystery to the minds of others, but to me it’s divine and utterly magical to see.

When my friendships with friends or others fades, my soul would cry and miss them, but my mind would accept their choosing differences and come to understand in time, but truly I must always allow a person to go along their own path, if I didn’t than my understanding and connection with that person would  be ruined and worse overtime. But by allowing them to move on and if they found new experiences that changed their life, it would make them happy and successful, not ruined or misunderstanding to you or me.

 

Relationships and friendships with others is one big adventure. Each day or a moment you share with a person, it’s all leading you to the higher step with them as the connection builds up to a higher stage in your life. Sometimes you may feel the connection can’t get any higher or the person closer to you, but if you talk and explain your inner truth to another person, then one way or another the advise will lead you to shockingly finding the true expression in how the other person’s feeling about you. It might take time for the right moment, but don’t give up, because if you do, then you’ll never know the truth or the results in how the connection could have lead in the end.

 

My connection is something over-powerful that I feel inside. My connection with you is very deep and true. My spirit and soul feels  very guiding towards you.Ever since we first communicated and talked on the social network through our computers, I knew my heart liked you. We had so much in common that it made me laugh. My spirit was sure that you were going to create a difference in my life, you made me very happy. I loved talking to you. Whenever we did talk, I knew I could trust you for sure, but my family or other people around us wouldn’t understand this. I knew I couldn’t tell anybody about my feelings, I could only confide it in my diary to Jay, and I didn’t tell him much either in case any problem happened between us.

 

But now I don’t care what other people think because I want our friendship to grow.  I know the reason in why my family has been so protective, it’s because they care  and want the best for me, and never hurt. If I told my family about us, they would think it’s dangerous to be-friending people from other countries over the world, but I find it rather interesting. I accept all people for the way they are.  Some people might find it strange, but anyone’s a stranger unless you get to know them. You were a stranger to me and I was a stranger to you, but when we got to know each other, a beautiful connection and friendship blossomed like the delightful spring or like a blissful breeze in the summer times.

 

I guess our families hope that we make the right decisions, but how can we follow them if they doubt our choices or interests in these things. The only way in truly knowing the right or wrong decision is by making sacrifices, because not everyone will accept or understand our chosen paths. But whatever path makes us happiest, is the right one.It’s quite a shame that some families can’t accept differences in their relatives or households, but what I think makes a true good family is by standing by and seeing how fulfilled and happy we all are to be together. If difficulties or faults happen, then I suggest it’s best to sort them out together instead of ignoring them because that truly and obviously shows lack of companionship in a home or a in family.Sometimes when people are unhappy, they feel they’ve made a mistake, but I think so, I think it’s  not the case at all. I believe we all learn from our mistakes and experiences, it doesn’t prove that we failed, it’s just that we’d either have to sort out the problem or move forward to find something more meaningful and common to our own interest and understanding at heart.

 

As I’ve said once before ‘‘Following the right path is not always the easiest one.’’

 

After a few months, I would chat with you about the new people in my life, and you were always there for me whenever needed or asked. I thought at first that you weren’t a boy with a charm of words, that I so dreamed of  finding, but I could sense that you did know what love really is. What I loved the most about you was your naturalism and your free spiritedness, it made me free and expressive around you, a choice I don’t usually become open in with most people, but I could with you. I loved how we could always laugh through every moment we shared. I loved how passionate you were about my true feelings and ways with words. I loved how much you overall believed in me. Every time our connection grew stronger at night I would have these dreams about us spiritually together. One night I remember having this dream of us with each other, I felt as if I was beside you in your bedroom. This dream seemed more like a vision; we were sitting on your bedside and we were talking about what it would be like if we lived a famous or successful life. I see myself rushing off your bedside and standing in the centre of your bedroom as I acted out this award ceremony with sarcasm. ‘Ladies and gentlemen, Mr Jason Mills looked stunning in his black suit and tie last night and was  awarded the bestselling writer of the year award, and his partner Marcus Howard gladly ran up onto the stage and kissed dear Jason on the lips as the audience and crowds then applauded with great respect.’  After I said this in the dream, you applauded for me with laughter and I then sat down next to you as I admitted my cowardliness in worrying about what other people might really think of me over me loving towards you as the same gender. I Seen that you then hugged and reassured me that people would understand us equally one day. You then told me that our love in pride makes everything else seem far less impossible as you said  ‘being true to your emotions at heart means a lot more then what people would expect you to be.’ Ever since that dream I began to believe in you more than a friend as loving emotions built up and grew strong within me, all for you they were. After  we recently began to realize that both of us felt the same way lovingly, a beautiful side of me came out of my body, a part of me  that doesn’t seem to be seen but almost feels divine in truth. I found it incredibly  cute when you told me that you felt like swimming all the way from where you are in England to Ireland, just to be with me.  When you told me this, it left me feeling out of this world in love with you, Marcus.  When I realized that you seen true beauty within as much as on the outside I then accepted your proposal in being my boyfriend because I felt safe and loved by you while we talked and had deep conversations about life in general or the deepest feelings or thoughts of what life means to us ever since we found another in love.  The trust and love with a human being can be a fragile thing unless its treated well.I’ve heard this saying from a dear loved one called Jamie, whom wrote me predictable poetry that remains to be true. In these last recent months, I’ve experienced all sorts of feelings and situations, all sorts of things in which Jamie wrote me a year before I felt or understand any of it at the time, before it all happened.

Love sure can be a fragile thing unless it’s being treated right and people work together, if not overtime a connection and relationship would fade over lack of commitment or teamwork with each other.  I feel that will never happen between us because even if we go separate ways or choose a different life path, I’ll still stand by you and be a good friend to you, just as I’ve always been. It mightn’t mean anything to you, but it’s the world to me. To see you feeling happy and at peace would mean a great deal to me because I’d feel cheerful to know that your loved and safe.

 

My life’s purpose is quite different. I feel successful and overjoyed to know the means of helping others. I love to entertain and have fun, but more than that, I want to make the world a more loving place, not a place of constant hate and misery of doubts in another.

 

I see the world in the way it’s supposed to be lived.

I see a world without jealousy and greed.

I see a world full of unique souls,

Filled with freedom and with a destiny to create,

 A path to follow.

I see inner talent and inner beauty within all people.

 

I see that the new generation is more loving and not ever hateful.

 

I see a tranquillity atmosphere in nature,

 

 I see a humanity that’s yet to be healed.

 

I see a life that’s going to be gone without me, I see a dream that forever stays within me.

 

Will I ever live to see the new world in a new day?

 

 

 

 

 

When I lay down to sleep, I rush towards this light that I never seem to reach. I see you standing there, in the centre of the sun, its not a shame to see how brightened you are because I can see it through your eyes and in your smile. When I reach you, I see that we are stars in the sky, our souls exist to shine, our bodies live to love. As I turn in the bed, I feel a comfortable feeling of love in me. The love comes from the sunshine in your heart.

 

The dream doesn’t end there,there is more to tell, the feeling is still as strong!

 

 

As I’m standing before you in this dream, it’s hard to believe we’re this close because we’ve never been in reality, it seems that it only happens in these dreams.We come from departed countries, from different distances across the world.I find it beautiful that we come from  different, disagreeing places because even though the disagreement remains in others,  the similar life backgrounds of ours  is what makes our differences completely common. A complete difference that’s yet to become a family from the equality and peace we believe in. We can show the world that we’re one. We may believe in different religions, but we didn’t choose our religions, we we’re born into a world from that specific belief, but our Fate comes from the love we have in all each other. I find it interesting to know  all about your true faith and dreams in the equality belief that we follow. We accept and believe in all nationalities and forgive those who don’t, because in a true sense, faith in God comes in many ways.

 

I know you grew up without a religion or a belief in anything specific towards faith, but I’m glad that I can show you the goodness in all beliefs and my own too, just as I believe in your trust. I know our people from the places we live in might disagree with another, but when love comes forward, it’s more powerful than all the fighting and hate they ever caused in all History. Our love may last a moment or for a lifetime, but either way, we learn from the connection and relationship we’ve had. All people are truly beautiful that love and choose to be good, but the ones who don’t didn’t see or seek this divine emotion yet.

 

I’m here, in this world to show all the love and beauty that comes from all places; in nature, in animals and in human beings. I’m here to brighten your day, I’m here to make you smile, I’m here  to change your life, I’m here to heal and show the beautiful side of the world, even if  in  the other parts  of places are failing or falling apart from soldiers at war or criminals  with damaged lives.

In times I do dream about the war, and I do think ‘‘Why should good men  be spared in a battlefield, when truly they we’re meant to see a better world too.’’I think there is better ways to serve your country than fighting, all that fighting and hate only leads to destroying it. We shouldn’t need to invade a place, we all should be part of the entire universe. We could be developing and improving all the world, together, instead of using all these jealous and greedy accusations or excuses to bring misery  and sadness on other poor civilians.  We could be bringing our future children into a safe world of peace, not a world of worry or of sufferings.

 

In this dream I see us travelling all of the world, I see that there is more people who feel just as we do. I see that we’re not alone or wrong to be loving in this way. I see this unique love as a gift from God. We feel in certain ways for a reason, if it’s from life experiences or because we’re just accepting and brave enough to be and to believe in ourselves. This love we have is special, it stands out as strange to everyone else, but to us, we’re sure it’s something right. It’s different than a family love, it’s a forever ending true love from the soul and from the guidance of our being. We can love and protect each other, we can hold another and feel safe, we can feel loved and passionate too. All our emotions and interest from sexuality is a personal and unique thing to us all, it’s just as unique as having different coloured eyes or skin. The only thing we really have in common is the human body of our gender.

 

Now you know why I feel a tender connection is more than all the other loving things, you can see now why love is so unique and divine for all people. Now you know my soul’s inner quest. I confided a great secret in you, I told you my love story that adapts to all the love that ever existed. All the love that came before us is just as beautiful as ours, even if we can’t see each other everyday or ever be together for real, but at least you know this connection and feeling that I have. Never let it go, keep it with you always, even when I’m gone to a new life connection with someone else, remember me as I am now because it will lead you the way.

 

I will never forget the words you first told me when we fell in love.

‘You opened your eyes, did you realize that you would be my saviour. And for the first breath that left your lips, did you know that it would change this world forever.’’

 

I will never forget them words you said, I’ll treasure them in memory, always. Thank you so much for loving me and being my friend,  for now and forever-lasting life!

Yours faithfully,
Jason Mills!

 

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Sunday, 30 October 2011

Dear Marcus Howard,

 

Greetings to you my good friend, this is Jason here and I’ve decided something… I’ve decided to write you a letter, in which I will write all about how I feel and about how I appreciate our connection and friendship in present. I’ve decided to open up my heart and innermost feelings to you, in a way that I’ve never done with anyone, not even in my diary. I’ve decided to accept your love and offer in taking a great part in my life, as I truly love your guidance and generosity. 

 

I’ve been thinking for a while in how our connection first started. I know it began through technology devices from our computers/laptops on a social network, but I do wonder what brought us together. I wonder if it’s fate or destiny, or just a great coincidence that luckily happened? Either way, inside myself I always felt close to you. I felt as if I understood you before we even chatted, it was an amazing feeling for me. I got this sense of understanding when you started communicating technically with me. I knew you were an open minded, carefree person who just accepts and loves the simple things in life, which is why I let my heart and true self open and out to you. In the beginning of our friendship, I told you all about myself as a person and about my life, in a way that you were common to knowing, without me seeming too complicated or extravagantly thoughtful . For example, when you told me that you loved nature, I then began to write you messages and words of hope  so that your interest could increase and your friendship could develop  with me, emotionally.  I did all this because I wanted you to find your way in life, so that you could follow the right path your heart so longing deserves.  I feel as if  we we’re put on this planet to help each other create a better world for humanity and the earth. After a while we became best friends and got to know each other fully. I shared some of my creative writings that I wrote to Jay; my inner self, and some of my stories and after I did we both would discuss what inspires us in life. When you told me that I was your inspiration, I fell  speechless as I felt privileged and overwhelmed by the love and respect you had for me.

 

We shared so many wonderful conversations with the blessing of having technology that kept us together, but deep down we both know that it’s our ancient spirits that found  a way in discovering each other. You tell me that you know for sure that we’ve shared so many past life’s together, and right now as I write this, I’m beginning to feel that you might be just right! Every time I see your eyes through a picture I feel a dazzling emotion flow through me, it leaves me breathless when I see your loving face. You told me once before that you had  a vision of me risking my life for you when we lived once before, in a time where this world went downhill, where people became cruel and nasty upon another. You said that you were in a battlefield at war and a soldier in the other army tried to shoot you but I jumped in front of you in protecting you from a tragic death as I felt the pain. I’ll never let this happen to us ever again, because our love and courage is much too strong to be destroyed, it’s eternally connected. One day people will seek the best of earth’s creation, but until then it’s our chance in embracing the moment in living and saving lives, just like we have with each other in the lives we’ve had before, together.

 

I imagine that after one shot of a bullet into my head, it would have immediately passed me through a different time of life. As I’m dead in your arms, I’d imagine my spirit watching over you as I move forward to the new generation of time, where the world of humanity changes to a new improved level. You tell me that you couldn’t without me so you ended your past life and followed me into this one, where we found each other again. When you told me all this through a conversation, my mind thought it was definitely insane but my heart and trust believed in you entirely. I know that it’s true how people think differently when in love, and I’m sure what you’re saying about us finding another again is simply an imaginative thought that you feel is right because you feel so close to me. But in reality terms I think it’s the sweetest thought of yours because to imagine me as your long lost love from a previous life is quite remarkable  as you’d definitely must have a deep connection with a person to feel such a way, and I’m thankful to be that person with you. The trouble with some people is that they judge other beliefs and feelings before taking a person’s differences into consideration, which is quite foolish of them to me because I want to try understanding others, but I guess I should take other people’s criticism and judgmental ways respectfully into consideration too because I wouldn’t be a wise person if I only thought of my own position or situation, I must think of other people’s accusations too. I try so hard to ignore or too forgive those who live in vain and those who live to cause and spread cruelty and misery upon the innocent, but how can I possibly stay polite and unsentimental  all  the time when the worst side of human nature follows the dark side of their selfish choices, where people do monstrous things without thinking or having a thought for one second in how children and the youth feel. I mean isn’t it obvious that young people rebel because they don’t have good influences around them. I mean isn’t it obvious that young people get angry or depressed when parents or family members do nothing but think of themselves. Some families care more of their society respect or given reputation then for the happiness or freedom for their children or younger ones. For sure I think young people should be given a choice and a voice to be heard. No one deserves to be ignored, abandoned or isolated of any age because we all we’re born and given a life opportunity to feel happy and alive. Anyways, in the end of the day we can’t change the way people see life but we can help and save their existence by being their friend or by giving them a smile, a hug or even a kiss if a relationship becomes elusive. We can’t take away the negativity and sorrow in some people because truly they can only change by saving themselves by making wiser choices or decisions, but we can give hope to the people who are positive believers and who are good at heart as this truly can brighten our planet. If we can spread enough positivity and help towards people then believe me life would be seen a lot easier, and problems could then be solved more understandably.

 

Through a lot of thought, it would take me a while until I can feel inner peace as I can sometimes hopelessly carry people’s energy or problems with me but my power to help and keep smiling is by closing my eyes in silence and taking in all the realization and imagining myself in a better place where I could be happy. As I imagine this ‘happier place’ I then would listen to my inner sense and find the answer to the meaning of my problem or position with others. To me, a happier place would be alone with nature or with a person I can so relate to, which brings my instinct to you at this moment as I see your love for me so reassuring and divine. There’s a very few of people who really know the real me, as my inner self is too different and impossible to express, which is why my outer self is too easy to judge.  What I mean is; there’s a difference between being Jason Mills and Jay. It feels as if I have two personalities; one side of me would be my sensitivity around people and my nature loving ways in life whom is easily seen from me as Jason, but my other half would be striking with my understanding faith and love for all  life and people, which usually comes out soulfully through Jay. Jay to me is more than just a soulful realization of myself, but Jay is a divine light that I feel is connected within the stars through  another universe upon a higher realm of life forms.  Jay is within the righteous side of me, this is when I can tell when something is right or wrong from the mysterious instinct that never lies, and jay is really the emotional sense of my being. What amazes me more about you, Marcus, is your faith and belief in me and Jay… I love how you can so understand me completely, your more than a loved one to me now, I feel your my friendly guide that will help me through this battle of life on earth. 

 

I’m ever so glad that we found each other because look out for the stars in the night sky as their shining light for the happiness we shine when communicating with another. Look now because everything in this wonderful planet seems beautifully connected with us. Look now as the sun is still shining as it shows life will go on through all phases. This sunshine will still shine even when it sometimes is hidden between sleepy clouds. Don’t forget me as I’m now smiling for the thankful connection we bonded and discovered through  a human life! Follow my footsteps  before they disappear within the sand. Follow my heart as I hope it never cries or gets hurt or even broken. Follow my dreams as it will one day live on through your  path and motivation. Believe in my inventions of memories and changes as much as my ideas to save people as you’ll one day see that it was truly worth saving and remembering. Listen to my voice as I speak out truth in a tone through passion and love as it never fades before your mind. Look deep into my eyes as you’ll seek the reflection of my inner soul’s existence. Overall I hope these feelings of mine become deeply understood as they mean so much to me, please don’t ever let them fade again. Remember me because I’ll never forget you, Marcus. I love you with all my heart, in a way that’s always different than anyone else as my connection with everyone is all so unique and pure. 

 

Before I end my saying in this letter, I’d just like to let you know a few things…. I hope one day, when your grey and old that you’ll find what your life’s purpose has been waiting for. I hope you live to remember me as a piece of our moments in time. I hope I’ve shown you enough happiness and given you enough love that should last you enough power to keep living on whenever I’m gone. Know inside yourself that no matter what happens to me or with our connection overtime, that I will always wish you a happy lifetime. Babe, I think you know deep down what I’m really trying to say here and what I want you to do… I want you to be safe and without worry or judgment of anyone but yourself. I want you to depend on true beauty which lies within the earth’s nature of life. I want you to keep my memory and words alive with you from wherever you may go. I want you to believe in yourself as I much I do myself. I want you to love everybody and every moment in life, and to make every second of happiness count as it truly matters most then the times that will come where you might feel alone or lost, but please remember that my heart and spirit isn’t ever far away. Marcus, just put your hand on your chest and listen closely to the rhythm of your heartbeat as you can survive each path through this battle or adventure to come. I hope that I will be at your side in the beginning and end of this life adventure, to help and save, but if it doesn’t work out for me, always remember what I’ve told you once before as we truly are never apart as my inner conscience is always close by you.

 

I think it’s now time that you’re guidance and acceptance in people should be seen by the world, and I’m only glad that I lived to be your first inspiration, to love and to write freely, within your own spirit and mind!

 

Yours faithfully,

Jason Mills/Jay!