DEALING WITH IT

Last month my grandmother passed away and its been hard. I didn't pass my math this semester so I have to go to another school. The stress on top of that is waiting to get in and then I have to tell them my sitaution about why I switched schools. It's been rough semester I barely passed my other classes I got C's and I wanted B's. My confidence is low and I can't seem to bring myself back up. I'm trying really hard to keep my head up but I keep feeling like my frustrations are pulling me back into the dark. I have never been free of a challenge and my NVLD disorder doesn't help and it sucks sometimes because it touches on everything I do. The only thing I can think of to turn into a positive is to get the word out because this dysfunction is unknown to the public. The only way I can maybe deal with it is make video diares showing what happens on a daily basis. I've dealt with this for my entire life not knowing until last year what the disorder was. I knew something was wrong with me at first I thought it was severe depression or some type of learning disability. But it is a social disorder and can sometimes interfere with academia. I've struggled with math for as long as I can remember and I do get depressed and cry every now and then. I cry because I wish I could be normal and be able to do more than just pass. I don't want to be a C average student and I don't want to just get by anymore because I know it'll catch up with me. ughhhhh I am so sick of feeling trapped and angry, and I really hope next year will be a hell of a lot better than this year.